Listen up, y’all, let’s talk about this “Assistant Professor Psychology” thing. Sounds fancy, huh? Like someone who knows a whole heap about how folks’ brains work.
What’s this job all about?
Well, from what I gather, it’s like bein’ a teacher in college, but for psychology. You know, that brain stuff. They teach young’uns all about thinkin’, feelin’, and doin’. It ain’t just readin’ books, though. These folks gotta do research too. Figure out why people act the way they do. Like why my neighbor, old Bessie, hoards cats, or why young Billy always gets into trouble.
What kinda stuff you gotta know?
Now, you can’t just waltz in there with no learnin’. You gotta have a bunch of degrees in psychology. Them fancy papers that say you went to school a long time. And not just any school, gotta be a good one. They call it “BPS recognized” or somethin’ like that. Sounds important, so it probably is. And you gotta be a “Chartered Psychologist” too. More papers, I guess. Seems like a whole lotta hoopla, if you ask me.
- Lots of psychology degrees
- Gotta be “BPS recognized”
- Gotta be a “Chartered Psychologist”
What do you actually do all day?
Well, teachin’, mostly. Standin’ up in front of a bunch of college kids, talkin’ their ears off about psychology. Gotta make it interesting, though, or them young’uns will fall asleep faster than my old hound dog after a big supper. And then there’s the research. Cookin’ up experiments, gettin’ people to participate, writin’ up reports. Lots of thinkin’ and figurin’. It ain’t like plantin’ corn, that’s for sure. And meetings, lots and lots of meetin’s. Talkin’ to other professors, plannin’ stuff, arguin’ about this and that. Sounds tiresome, if you ask me.
Where do you find these jobs?
Now, I ain’t never looked for one of these jobs myself, but I hear tell they’re all over the place. On the internet, mostly. Places like “*” or “*” or “*.” Sounds like a bunch of gibberish to me, but them young folks know how to use it. Seems like there’s a powerful lot of these jobs out there, too. Hundreds, maybe even thousands. So, if you’re one of them smarty-pants types, you probably got a good chance of findin’ somethin’. They’re always lookin’ for “assistant professors” or “lecturers” or “associate professors.” Lots of fancy names for teachin’ jobs, I reckon.
Who are they lookin’ for?
Well, they want someone smart, obviously. Someone who knows their psychology inside and out. But it ain’t just about book learnin’. They want someone who can teach too. Someone who can explain things in a way that even I could understand, though that might be askin’ too much. And they want someone who can do research. Someone who can come up with new ideas and test them out. And, I reckon, they want someone who’s a good person. Someone who cares about their students and wants to help them learn. They say they want to add to their “esteemed faculty,” which I guess means they want someone who’s good at their job and won’t embarrass the college.
Full-time or part-time?
Now, some of these jobs are full-time, and some are part-time. A full-time job is like workin’ all week, every week. A part-time job is more like workin’ just a day or two. I saw one that was just one day a week, seven and a half hours. That don’t sound too bad. Even an old woman like me could handle that. But mostly, they seem to want someone full-time, thirty-seven and a half hours a week. That’s a lot of thinkin’ about brains!
Is it worth it?
Well, that depends on what you’re lookin’ for. If you like learnin’ and teachin’ and figurin’ things out, then it might be a good job for you. It probably pays decent, too, though I don’t know how much exactly. Enough to buy a good tractor, maybe? But it’s a lot of hard work, that’s for sure. Lots of readin’, writin’, and thinkin’. And dealin’ with them college kids, that can’t be easy. But if you’re good at it, and you like it, then I reckon it’s a pretty good way to make a livin’. It keeps you off the streets, and it’s better than hoein’ cotton all day, that’s for sure. So, if you’re thinkin’ about becomin’ an “Assistant Professor Psychology,” well, good luck to ya. You’re gonna need it. It seems like a lot of work to me, but somebody’s gotta do it, I guess.
Final thoughts
So there you have it. A little bit about this “Assistant Professor Psychology” job. It ain’t for the faint of heart, that’s for sure. But if you’re smart, hard-workin’, and you like messin’ with people’s heads, then it might just be the job for you. Just remember what I told ya, and you’ll do alright.
